So on Saturday morning I checked my Covid PCR test results from a test I took on Thursday… and it was positive.

I honestly couldn’t believe. First, I’m not sure how I even contracted it and I thought it was allergies.

So here we are the following Wednesday, and I’m still in quarantine. I’ve been trying to keep myself busy in a few ways:

1. During my trip to Florida, I was thinking about how I wanted to deep clean my room and take better care of it, so I made a list of different parts of my room I wanted to tackle; the closet, my dresser, my desk, bookshelf, under my bed, etc. During my quarantine, I was able to go through my multiple dressers and get rid of things. It felt cathartic to let things go. I always felt like I needed to hold onto things, but I realized that holding onto things I don’t need is like being tied down. It’s almost like having too many physical possessions adds to your weight, keeping you back. I got rid of a whole tub worth of papers, and bags of clothes I plan on recycling. While cleaning my room I found an empty cat picture frame and decided to put a picture of my cat Stanley as a baby that my aunt gave to me.
2. Before I got sick with Covid, I started doing some yoga when I realized that I should confront the tension I was feeling in my shoulders and back. Doing yoga has been incredibly beneficial for me, and I am feeling less tension in my body and mind. It’s become something I look forward to and I enjoy doing it before bed. Yoga often puts me in a mindset to meditate, and it helps me feel more one with my body.
3. I helped my dad with some lawn work over the weekend. I was incredibly lucky because the weekend I got sick happened to have summer weather. I helped pick up sticks around the yard, loosen the ground to plant grass seeds and water the seeds I planted. In the backyard, I planted a bunch of vegetable and herb seeds last week and they’re already starting to sprout. When it becomes the fall, I’d like to get those portable green houses and keep plants going through the winter.
4. After doing yard work, I relaxed on a floatie in my pool. It was really nice.
5. I started looking for ways I can make money on the side.

Personally, it’s really hard for me to just relax. Even when I was feeling a little sick, I feel like all my time has to be productive, or else it’s time waisted. It’s certainly something I need to work on, but I guess it’s hard when you’re stuck at home, but you really don’t even feel that sick, yet your presence could pose a danger to someone else.

Now that it’s been a week since my symptoms started, I can technically go into the public again, as long as I wear a mask. But it’s still hard.

Yesterday I was one of the millions of Americans grieving those babies who were murdered while in elementary school in Texas.

I hope this is the event that can finally spark change, and make schools safe for kids.

My faith tells me that all those children and the two teachers are in paradise, to never experience a moment of fear ever again. But to think of their last moments, those children wishing to be with their mom and dad, those teachers sacrificing their lives for their students, and the anguish that the families will have to live through, is just a shock to the symptom. To think that one man can just uproot the lives of so many… for nothing, is beyond what most people could even fathom.

I hope that Americans can come together to create laws that prevent atrocities such as these, so that these parents can be comforted in the fact that no other child or parent like themselves will have to experience such anguish, unlike the parents of the victims in Columbine, Sandy Hook, Parkland, etc.

I can just hope.